A Part of Me
by Angiecakes.2012
Summary: Dean finds himself to be timid when it comes to initiating a first move onto Castiel, but it is so worth it when he finally does.


**Warning:** Mild Spoilers from seasons 4-6.

Also sex.

For the fourth night in a row Sam was at some chick's house. Dean didn't really mind that much, he liked seeing Sam happy. He was just glad that their lives were able to be somewhat normal for a while. Bobby hadn't called in weeks with news on a case, and it seemed pretty quiet across the whole country. The sudden lack of human contact made him get kind of lonely, though, so Dean resorted to calling Cas. Awkward Angel company was better than no company at all.

Dean sat at the end of the dirty motel bed and put his hands together. "Hey Cas, uh, if you're not doing anything at the moment you should pop dow-" Dean stopped as he heard the familiar _whooshing_ sound of Cas arriving.

"Are you in trouble?" Cas asked with a vague look of concern on his face.

"No, no, it's nothing like that. I was just wondering if you wanted to hang out tonight." Dean said, chuckling. He still couldn't believe he was actually asking Cas to hang out.

"I… don't think I understand what you mean." Cas answered, looking slightly confused.

"Well, we haven't had a case in weeks so I haven't seen you for a while. I figured we could just kind of… you know, hang out. Watch some crap television, drink beer, and eat pizza or something."

"I suppose that does sound pleasant." Cas said with a half-smile. "I don't think I've ever just 'hung out' with someone." Cas finished while looking over-joyed, yet maintaining his normal stoic, fearless Angel, look.

"Haha, alright. You find something to watch, and _no_ porn this time, and I'll order a few pizzas. What kind do you like?"

"I believe Hawaiian was the term for the kind that we had last time. I quite enjoyed it. I'll try my best to find something with as little erotic nature as possible on the television." Cas said making his way towards the TV.

Dean laughed to himself while he dialed the local pizza joints number. There wasn't a doubt about it, Cas was pretty great entertainment. Dean hadn't thought about how much he actually _missed_ Cas. Just like Cas had said a few months ago, they do share quite a bond. Dragging someone out of hell will do that to some people.

A few minutes later Dean walked back in to the front of the motel room and joined Cas on the couch while setting two beers on the coffee table in front of them. "So, the pizzas will be here in less than an hour. Did you find anything on the tv?" Dean asked while opening one of the beers and taking a drink.

"Yes. I found a movie about this family that got a dog. I'm not quite sure what the point of it is yet. It seems that the dog causes a lot of trouble." Cas responded while he grabbed the other beer, stared at it, and then popped of the cap. He took a small drink, and then set it back down.

"Oh, this movie. Haha, man. The first time I watched this I actually cried. Sammy was crying harder so he didn't notice me."

"A movie about a dog reduced you to tears?" Cas replied while questionably looking at Dean.

"Yeah, you'll see. It's actually not that bad of a movie. I think you'll like it."

The next ten minutes were mostly silent. Dean was the only one really laughing at the funny parts of the movie. Every time he did, Cas would look over at him and smile. Eventually, Cas started actually joining in. Dean was pretty happy with this. Cas was actually starting to lighten up. Cas had also started to gradually sink into the couch instead of sitting straight right at the end of the cushion like he usually did. Dean had always hoped that eventually he and Cas could become friends, that is, if they both survived everything.

Four beers into the night, Cas finally broke the silence. "Dean, I really appreciate you calling me down here tonight. This is much more pleasant than sitting in the garrison."

Dean smiled, looked over at Cas, and retorted, "I really appreciate you showing up. I honestly didn't know whether or not to expect you to respond."

"I told you I would always come when you called, Dean, and I meant it." Cas said seriously before he fixed his gaze back at the tv.

Dean was already starting to feel slightly buzzed. He wondered exactly how much alcohol it would take to get an Angel drunk. He guessed it was pretty far out of his price range.

Finally, a knock on the motel door let Dean know that the pizza had arrived. Before he was able to stand up, Cas had already used his Angel mojo to get to the door. "I can see that you are slightly intoxicated. I wouldn't want you to injure yourself." Cas said jokingly with a smirk.

"Wait, are you actually joking with me? Seriously? I could get used to this." Dean replied.

Cas walked back over to the couch and sat down. He handed Dean the meat lovers pizza, while he kept the pineapple and ham pizza for himself. "You know, man. I still don't understand how you could have fruit on your pizza. That's just wrong on so many levels." Dean told Cas.

"Yes, well, I happen to enjoy the fruit." Cas said, smiling.

"Whatever does it for you." Dean finished.

After the pizzas were gone and Dean finished his seventh beer, he decided he needed to switch to water. He didn't want to get belligerent.

Dean looked over at Cas, who had tears running down his cheeks silently. "The dog, it… it was so innocent." Cas whispered.

"Yeah, I know, it sucks." Dean was glad that he was hardly paying attention. He didn't want to turn into a blubbering mess in front of Cas.

Dean stared over at Cas. He'd never thought that they could have such a good time together. He couldn't remember the last time he'd really had a friend other than Sammy. Being a hunter didn't really allow much of a social life since everyone he got close to usually dropped dead. He didn't know if it was the alcohol, but he felt like there was a possibility for more than just friendship between them. He felt unbelievably close to him, and they had amazing chemistry, there was no doubting that. Cas had saved his life on more than one occasion, and it's hard to not get extra feelings for someone after something like that.

"Dean, are you slowly getting closer to me on the couch on purpose or is it accidental?" Cas asked.

"Yeah, well. Yeah, it is on purpose. Listen, Cas, have you ever had feelings for someone?" Dean asked in reply.

"I don't understand what you mean by 'feelings'. I generally care for all humans. Is that what you're asking?" Cas said answering the question to the best of his ability.

"Well, was there ever one person who you cared more for?"

"Of course. You, your brother, and Bobby are all very important to me now. I assume that you remember that it all started with you. I know Uriel visited you and told you that I had a weakness for you and that I liked you, which cause them to revoke my earthly duties for a period. I also assume that you still remember when I ignored all orders from heaven and followed your orders instead. I hope this answers your question."

Dean didn't have a response. Of course he remembered all of that. He'd never really _thought_ about it, though. He scooted a bit closer to Cas, and then stopped. "Wait, what the hell am I doing?" He thought to himself. "Cas is a dude. I think… Angels don't really have a gender, but his vessel is a dude." Then it hit Dean. He'd be attracted to Cas no matter what type of vessel he was in. It wasn't the vessel that he was attracted to, it was _Cas_. It was always Cas.

Dean looked up at Cas. He was only a few inches away now. He nudged himself over until the fibers of their pants were barely brushing together. "Dean, what ar-" He couldn't finish his sentence before Dean firmly places his own lips on top of Cas's. Cas seemed frozen and uncomfortable so Dean pulled himself away. "Is something wrong?" Dean asked.

"I… I've never. I don't understand." Cas replied shakily while looking down at his hands. Cas looked down for a few seconds, and then looked back up into Dean's eyes. Slowly he took his hand and placed it on Dean's right shoulder. He leaned in, closed his eyes, and kissed Dean. The kiss was electric. It was unlike anything Dean had ever felt before. He'd kissed lots of women in his past but this felt different; it felt meaningful. Cas moved his hand up Dean's neck and caressed the side of his face. Dean could hardly believe this was reality. I mean, yeah, he's fantasized before, but he never thought that anything would _actually _happen between him and Cas.

They were kissing slowly and passionately while their hands were going everywhere. Dean was switching between tenderly grabbing at Cas' back, and feeling the strong definition of his angelic chest muscles. Cas seemed quite content with Dean's hair and cheeks. They were so consumed with each other that they didn't hear Sam walk through the front door.

"Woooooaaaaah. Woah. Okay. You could have put a damn sock on the door." Sam said chuckling while running past them with his hands over his eyes. He was running toward the bathroom at such a speed that it must have been an emergency. Dean doubted that he would have stayed in the motel if it wasn't.

Dean and Cas now sat next to each other, awkwardly looking forward, not saying a word.

"Well, that was quite enjoyable." Cas said breaking the silence.

"You know what? It was more than that." Dean said smiling up at Cas as he reached over and grabbed Cas' hand and interlocked their fingers. He was still in disbelief. He was expecting to wake up at any given moment because there was no way in hell this was actually happening. His Castiel, well, more like the Castiel that owned him, was just kissing him, and now they're holding hands.

Dean let go of Cas' hand and grabbed the back of his head instead and pulled him in for another short kiss. He was just unable to resist it any more. Cas shifted on the couch so that his front side was gently pushing against Dean while his arm was placed firmly around Dean's waist. They stopped again to the sound of Sam clearing his throat behind them.

"I was in the bathroom for two minutes and you two are right back at it? Is there something you should tell me, Dean?" Sam said with some extra sass.

"Uh, yeah, Sammy, yeah. Cas and I," he stopped and looked into Cas' eyes before continuing. "I think Cas and I have a thing for each other. I don't think either of us expected it… it just sort of… happened." He finished, chuckling. He never imagined having to explain this type of situation to his little brother.

"Ha, I'm not really that surprised, to be honest." Sam said as he flopped down on the chair to the right of Dean and Cas.

"I don't understand. This situation should be nothing but surprise for you. Before this there was no doubt that Dean was heterosexual, and I am an Angel of the Lord. How could you have predicted any of this to prevent the element of surprise?" Cas asked.

"You two have more eye-sex than any two people I've ever seen. Bobby and I actually had a bet on whether or not you two would actually realize that you're in love with each other. And hey, it looks like I won." Sam said with a smirk.

"Woah, hold on a second. You're telling me that you and Bobby mad a _bet_on this? Are you serious?" Dean asked sharply.

"I'm sensing that you need to talk to your brother alone. Call me again soon, Dean." Cas said right before disappearing. Dean didn't even have time to protest. His leg immediately felt cold without Cas next to him and the room was suddenly filled with an empty hue, as if a part of him wasn't there anymore.

"So… do you want to talk about what just happened?" Sam asked after a few moments of silence.

"What's there to say?" Dean replied while he was getting up, obviously trying to avoid the conversation.

"Hey, if you don't want to talk about it, that's fine. If you and Cas are happy, great. I hope things can work out. You have my support, you know that, right?" Sam said reassuringly.

Dean had his back to Sam, so Sam didn't see Dean's cheeks flush with color above his fullest smile. "Yeah. I'll keep that in mind." Dean answered trying to appear stoic. He didn't understand why Sammy was being so… calm about things. If the tables were turned Dean would have probably flipped out at first.

"I'm going to bed. If you want to talk in the morning we can." Sam yawned out as he made his way to one of the motel beds.

"Yeah, sure thing. 'Night Sammy."

Dean just sat at the end of his own bed and thought about what had all happened. He couldn't help but to feel it was… wrong. How could that kiss have been wrong, though? It was phenomenal. Dean had never been kissed like that. Every time he'd kiss a chick all that he would be thinking about was what came next, but not with Cas. With Cas, he would have been content just sitting there kissing him endlessly.

Dean got up and washed his face in the bathroom. He looked up at himself in the mirror and grinned. "You've kissed two Angel's now. Not bad." He thought to himself.

He swaggered himself back to his bed and laid down. He worked off his jeans under the covers and threw them across the room and then let the covers engulf him. A half an hour later, though, Dean was still wide awake with his thoughts. He missed Cas like crazy. He rolled over and looked at Sam who was snoring loudly. Since Sam usually slept like a rock he decided to give Cas a call.

"Hey Ca-" Dean couldn't even finish two words before Cas appeared right in front of him. He wasn't wearing his normal trenchcoat outfit, though. Instead, he was wearing a loose pair of grey boxer shorts and a loose fitting, blue, t-shirt.

"Hello, Dean. I was waiting eagerly for your call. How did things go with Sam?"

"Cas, what're you wearing? And don't talk so loud, we don't want to wake the moose." Dean whispered, chuckling.

"My apologies. I'm wearing this because… well, it's late. I don't mean to jump to conclusions but if you're calling me this late and it's not because your life is in immediate danger then it must mean that you would like some company in your bed, especially after certain events that happened earlier this evening. I didn't think that laying down it that outfit would be very comfortable for either of us. If it is an issue I can change." Cas whispered back.

"Oh, no, I like it, actually. It's… nice." Dean couldn't get out the word 'cute', although that's what he meant. He laughed at himself for being so timid. The last time he was this nervous he was trying to ask out a freshman girl while he was in sixth grade. "Hey, uhm, you don't have to just stand there if you don't want." Dean said as he shot Cas a way-too-big cheesy grin and patted the space next to him on the bed. "Okay seriously, that was the worst thing you could have done. Never smile like that again," Dean said to himself.

Lucky for Dean, Cas thought he was charming and accepted the invitation. As Cas was getting under the covers Dean thought that his heart and stomach were going to implode simultaneously. "Okay, seriously, dude. Get yourself together. You're going to make yourself look like an ass," Dean thought, scolding himself.

Dean was slightly sitting up on one side of the bed while Cas sat up on the other side. Dean looked over at Cas and smiled. Castiel, his Angel, was now in the same bed with him. Dean scooted himself down so he was fully lying on his back, outstretched his left arm, and raised his eyebrows at Cas. With almost no hesitation Cas, too, laid down and placed his head on Dean's firm chest while he wrapped his arm around Dean's waist. Dean then rolled over to face Cas and pulled him even closer. "Dean, would it be alright if I kissed you right now?" Cas asked in a very serious, but shaky tone.

"You don't need to ask," Dean replied softly as he took his hand and placed it gently on the side of Castiel's face. He then slowly grabbed the Angel's chin and lifted it slightly so their lips were level with each other. He gazed into Cas's eyes for a few seconds before he went in for the kiss. In efforts to be as close to each other as possible their arms were wrapped tightly around each other while their legs were intertwined. The warmth of their bodies aching to be together added a mix of heat and passion to their kiss. Suddenly Cas pulled away. "Something wrong?" Dean asked with concern.

"Nothing, no, I don't know, I… I'm not quite sure what to say here, Dean. I'm not very adapted to how humans act with each other yet. I don't really understand what to make of how I'm feeling at the moment." Cas said slowly and softly.

"Well, then let's talk, Cas." Dean replied supportively. He rolled back over onto his back and pulled Cas in close to his side. Cas rested his head in the nook of Dean's shoulder and placed his hand on his chest. Dean took the hand that wasn't around Cas and placed it on his own chest, on top of Cas's.

"I'm finding this moment to be very surreal. I've never been romantically involved with anyone, not even in heaven. I feel like I'm nauseated, but I know that's not true. While we were kissing I could have sworn there were small creatures moving around in my stomach, and my heart was beating at an alarming rate."

Dean smiled. Cas had _butterflies_ because of him. "That's all normal, Cas. When humans like someone and they're around that person they get what we call 'butterflies' in our stomachs, and our hearts beat faster because we're excited." He answered while softly tracing Cas's spine.

Cas rolled over onto his stomach and put his chin on Dean's chest. "Dean Winchester, I believe that I am undoubtedly in love with you."

Dean's mind was going a mile a minute. _Love?_ Cas actually _loved_ him. He supposed it was possible, and the more he thought about it the more he realized that he loved Cas back. They'd been through so much together. Cas was there for him when his whole world fell apart and he helped pick up the pieces of his broken soul. Cas drug him out of hell leaving his handprint forever burned into Dean's arm, and forever burned into his heart. Cas was his knight in shining armor, as cliché as it sounds. Unable to hold himself back anymore Dean took his arms and wrapped them tight around Cas's waist and pull him up on top of him. While straddling Dean, Cas grabbed the back of Dean's head and kissed him fiercely with an open mouth so they explore each other more in depth. "I love you so much," Dean muffled out without stopping the kiss. With both of his hands Dean grabbed Cas's ass and grinded hard against the pressure it created. Cas let out a muffled moan of approval.

Dean pushed Cas off of him and shoved him back-first into the empty space next to him. He climbed on top of Cas and straddled him tightly, and removed both of their shirts. With his right hand he forcefully grabbed the back of Cas's head and pulled it back leaving his neck exposed and promptly started to kiss, bite, and suck it until almost the whole front side of his neck was covered in hickies. He used his left hand to feel every inch of Cas's body that he could reach at the angle at which he was straddling him. Cas was also doing some exploring of his own. He ran his hands up and down Dean's back feeling every muscle move under his skin as Dean rhythmically grinded against him.

"Dean…?" Cas barely groaned out.

"Yeah?" Dean replied, still latched to Cas's neck.

"I fear… we will wake your… brother if we continue this here," Cas said between moans of pleasure.

"Right, yeah, wait, woah, where are we going?" Dean exclaimed when he heard the familiar _whooshing_ of them leaving. He looked around to where they landed. It was beautiful. They were on top of the fluffiest white bed he had ever seen. It was deep in the greenest rainforest he'd ever seen. It wasn't a normal forest, though, since it didn't have all of the animals and the bugs. "Cas… how di-"

"I set this up after I left while you and Sam were talking. I didn't know if we would need it or not but I figured it would be best to prepared." Cas said smirking. He was obviously proud of himself.

"Yeah, okay, but where exactly are we?" Dean asked as he went back to lightly kissing the lower part of Cas's neck.

"We're in a part of heaven that is all mine. With you here… it is complete. I don't even want to imagine the trouble I'd be in if anyone found out that I've taken you here." Cas chuckled out.

Dean moved down from Cas's neck and began to kiss the outline of his collarbone. "Okay, well how did you even _get _me here?"

"Shortly after we began working together I relocated my area in heaven to an area that is exactly between the area where humans go, and where Angels go. With enough concentration I can get a maximum of four humans here at once. I was only planning on using it as a last resort if you, Sam, or Bobby were badly injured or near death." Cas replied.

Dean stopped for a moment and looked up at Cas. "You really thought of everything, didn't you?" He smiled and stretched forward to kiss Cas softly on his lower lip.

"When it comes to your safety I like to… what's that term you humans use to show thoroughness… cover all the bases?" Cas whispered while lightly kissing Dean's forehead. "The moment I first saw your soul in Hell… I knew that I would devote the rest of my life to protecting you."

Dean sat silently on top of Cas. He had no idea how much Cas actually cared for him. It hardly seemed real. "And how exactly did I get so lucky?" Dean said, chuckling lightly.

Cas didn't say anything in response. Instead grabbed Dean's shoulders and pulled him down on top of him and kissed him intensely. Imitating what Dean had done earlier, Cas grabbed Dean's ass and pulled down while grinding aggressively against him. After a few moments Cas stopped grinding and used profound strength to flip Dean back onto his back and straddled him again with no hesitation. Again imitating Dean, he kissed Dean's collarbone. Instead of moving up to Dean's neck, however, Cas took things in another direction. He slowly started scooting downs Dean body, kissing every inch of his well-defined chest. He moved further down and kissed below Dean's bellybutton but kept moving his hands down and grabbed the inside of Dean's burly thighs and pushed them slightly apart.

Dean's testosterone was going crazy. He felt like the bulge in his boxers was about to explode at any given moment. Feeling his dick pressed so close to Cas's throat was almost too much to handle. He lightly, but forcibly, grabbed the back of Cas's hair and slowly tried to get Cas to move further south. Cas complied with ease. He moved his hands up Dean's thighs to the waistband around his boxers and tugged them down while kissing the newly exposed skin. Cas grabbed Dean's exposed dick and began to lightly stroke it while he continued to move downward, kissing around the entire base of Dean's shaft.

Cas then slowly licked up his penis, following every vein. When he reached the tip he looked up at Dean, and gave him a devilish smile right before he took all of Dean at once in his mouth. Dean screamed out in ecstasy and thrust upward. Cas moved up and down his rod sucking hard and fast. Unable to contain himself anymore Dean ripped Cas off of him and threw him face-down on the bed and climbed on top of him. He started kissing the back of his neck and moved up to his ear and whispered, "A human vessel with an Angel inside of it can take a lot more pain than the average human, right?"

"Yes, very much so. If you remember the first time we met, you stabbed me in the chest and I barely flinched." Cas replied.

"Well then I guess this should be no problem for you." Dean said hoarsely. He kissed all the way down Cas's spine and removed his boxers, exposing his bare ass. He stood on his knees and grabbed Cas's ass and pulled it up towards his own groin while holding Cas's shoulders down against the bed. Dean grabbed his own dick and found the entrance of Cas's anus. He took the tip and lightly rubbed the outside at first. If he was with a human there was no way he would get away with what he was about to do.

He made sure his dick was still lined up with Cas's hole and aggressively thrust himself deep inside. Cas moaned out loudly with a mix of pain and pleasure. Dean grabbed Cas's hips and continued to thrust violently while moaning loudly himself. His thrusting picked up speed as he leaned forward and grabbed Cas's head and pulled it up towards his own and started kissing and biting his neck, before moving to his mouth to make out with him. Dean unlatched himself from Cas's mouth and shoved him hard back into the bed, thrusting as hard as he could.

"Dean… I… I think something's about to happen…" Cas moaned out, muffled through a pillow. Dean, too, felt himself about to cum. "Come on… you can last longer than this," Dean thought to himself. Then again, he'd never fucked anything quite so tight with such force before.

Dean stopped trying to hold it back and with one last thrust he came loudly, deep inside Cas, who was screaming with pleasure. Dean guessed that he had seconds before Cas came, too, so he quickly flipped him over onto his back and took Cas into his mouth. Using his hand and mouth simultaneously he sucked as hard as he could on Cas's throbbing dick. Just moments later he felt Cas come down the back of his throat. Cas grabbed the back of Dean's head and pushed it down even further down his cock, shouting out as orgasmic shivers ran through his entire body.

Cas's entire body almost immediately went limp after he finished arriving. He laid down on his back, panting heavily. Dean wiped his mouth and crawled up on top of Cas, and rested his head underneath his solid chin. Cas took his arms and wrapped them securely around Dean, holding him as tight as he could. Their breathing slowly steadied, and a few moments later, Dean was snoring on top of Cas.

Dean awoke a few hours later and immediately noticed that they weren't in heaven anymore. He rolled over off of Cas's chest and instead cuddled up to his side. He put his head down on the front side of Cas's shoulder. "Good morning, Dean, did you sleep well?" Cas asked after kissing Dean's forehead.

"Yeah, yeah. Why're we back in the motel? And you didn't have to lay with me the whole time; you must have been bored out of your mind." Dean yawned out sleepily.

"I didn't think it was safe to keep you up there for an extended period of time. If the wrong people found us we would both be in a lot of trouble. I also didn't mind lying with you. I deeply enjoyed watching you sleep, and feeling your chest expand against mine every time you took a breath was also equally enjoyable." Cas replied while running his fingers through Dean's hair.

"Right." Dean said, blushing, "And where's Sammy?"

"I sent your brother out to bring back breakfast. I would have gone myself but I did not wish to wake you."

Dean smiled and closed his eyes while he nuzzled closer into Cas. The perfect night turned into the perfect morning. He hoped that Sam wouldn't mind, but Cas was going to be with them most of the time from now on. He didn't know what was going to happen in their lives since they were technically still at war with practically everything in the world, but he hoped that he would end up with Cas after everything was over with. As long as Cas still loved him he knew that even his own death wouldn't be able to keep him and Cas separated.

"Hey, Cas?" Dean asked innocently.

"Yes, Dean?" Cas replied.

"I love you."

"I love you, more."


End file.
